Sporking comic
[[Couple under covers in bed,spooning to the left, with women on left shown by the creases in sheets]] Woman: Hold up. I asked for spooning. Man: We're sporking. Close enough. Narrator: Gretchen would play along if not for the broken metaphor: If you call yourself a spork, you'd better have more than one prong.

4/17/11 3:13AM

“And those prongs better not be attached in the middle.”

“And they sure as hell better not be up my butt.”

For your information, it’s called diphallia, it’s super rare, and it, on occasion, allows you to simultaneously aim at adjacent commodes.

Like my pappy used to say, “You ain’t sporking ‘less you’re porking.” Actually, he didn’t, but I imagine it’d be great to have a hillbilly dad who’d teach me that sort of truism. And other pork related life lessons.