A Very Nipples Christmas Part 2

A Very Nipples Christmas Part 2 comic
Narrator: Since curing his kleptomania was out of the question, Robin Hood had to find a more worthy crowd upon which to bestow his plunders. What once was rich vs. poor became naughty vs. nice. But nearly all those that appeared nice were, in some sense, naughty. [[Robin Hood scratching head]] Robin Hood: Those priests seemed grateful and all, but I'm not sure I'm comfortable with what they intended to do with those sheep. [[Sheep in field wearing a pink bra and a nun's veil]] Sheep: Bah. Robin Hood: I need a new plan. Little John: Have you considered children? Robin Hood: And let them suffer the same fate as those sheep? Robin Hood: Are you mad!? Little John: No, not like that. Little John: Give the gifts to children. Narrator: Early on, children were confused with how best to use the age-inappropriate presents. [[Young boy that looks like Calvin with the boot of reckoning on his head, riding same sheep with the same rug as a cape, wielding a candelabra, charging at the armoire of sorrows with another candelabra in a drawer.]] Boy: Have at thee, Wardrobean scum! Boy: Drawer thy weapon!

12/27/10 6:40AM

Sex with sheep is baaaahd.

Boy: Armoire! Ha, more like arm-less.

Feel free to hate me for either one of those.

Wardrobean sounds like some bellicose horde of warriors, no? Desert based, I’d say. With camels and awesome earflaps on their headgear and spears and goggles.

I know what you’re thinking: “A Monday comic, what gives?” Well, tis the season. In case you forgot why that young boy might be fighting an armoire and wearing a boot on his head, reread the previous comic. This is more cutesy than we normally do, but c’mon, I dare you to tell me that last panel’s not adorable.

Clearly little John is not a proponent of Hobbesian thought. Most adults have their evil sides, but the children I know are masters of violence, selfishness, and carnal pleasure. Robin Hood should be stealing their stuff and giving it to us. I could totally go for a Speak & Spell right about now.