9/7/11 4:27AM

No way this fella was born with the power. He’d never have gotten this far. Must’ve snuck up in waves. Random flashes of extreme motion sickness. Vomiting without warning. Until finally, an unending reminder that we’re all passengers on a hunk of rock hurdling through space.

That last bit is debatable. Without a proper reference frame, it’s hard to say what velocity means. Who’s to say our planet, solar system, universe, and beyond aren’t all spinning in such a way that really, we’re sitting pretty? Suck it, Copernicus. Geocentrism is back, baby.

Oh, and in a continued effort to cite our sources, you might want to go check this out. Scroll down a bit, it doesn’t get as good until 13th Bullet Bulletproof.

-Jesse